Father-to-be new to HomeDad.....any advice gladly received!!

[jimbob78]

Hi there!
Im a father-to-be (well May 30th hopefully!) living in Clerkenwell, London with my beautifully pregnant girlfriend!
We have decided that after my girlfriends maternity leave that i will take on the role of the SAHD due to mainly financial reasons. I must say i am extremely excited about becoming a dad and cant wait to meet the "bump" that we have for some reason unknown to either of us temporarily named it "Stephen"???!!!!
I am also finding the prospect of becoming a SAHD rather daunting and therefore any advice thrown my way would be greatly appreciated....
Looking forward to hearing from you....
Cheers

[Simon Windisch]

My advice, don't have daily deadlines, have weekly ones, most stuff can wait as long as the baby is OK.

[garynortheast]

Hallo and welcome along. You'll be doing what we all do then and winging it/making it up as you go along! As Simon says, just be flexible and welcome a certain amount of anarchy into your life at least for the first few months.

Keep us posted on progress.

[jaycee]

My advice is sleep now! Sleep sleep sleep - both of you!

No seriously it's the best thing in the world!

You've got Lincoln Inn Fields and the Barbican - great quiet spots for you and the little one - sometimes! I've found our children's centres a great way to meet other parents and kids and know other people locally. We are in SE London and you know how things can be in London sometimes - no one talks to you!

Best of luck!

[Benjibogs]

Firstly hello and congratulations!

My advice to the both of you is to let things settle for the first few months, everything can be really up in the air with a new baby and coming to terms with what to do, when and how to do it. Don't get too stressed about things you really have no control over.

When it's your turn to take over, try and get to some groups, don't worry about the mum's being wary of you, they will warm to you.

Most of all enjoy your time with 'Stephen'.

[robb]

Congratulations! Not just on the bump but on getting a permit to be a SAHD. It's an honour and a rarity for the Dad to share such and important part of the little persons life.

But for now, you've got plenty of time on your hands - comparatively - make the most of the time with your girlfriend. Once baby arrives you'll be ships passing in the night! Plus get all those 'little jobs' around the place sorted.

When your girlfriend does hand the baby over to you, probably about a year from now, get into a routine of going to the local playgroups as much as possible. The mums will see you and slowly you'll make some friends.

Oh and the most important bit of advice: Stick around on HomeDad.org.uk!

Rob

[perkin]

Hello. I became a SAHD for a similar reason to you. The cost of putting 3 kids into childcare cost as much as I was paid.

As others have said - go to groups. When you first walk in, they may all stop talking and look at you in surprise, but just persevere and talk kids!! I enjoy the groups I go to now and it breaks up the day.

The biggest surprise when my first arrived, was that we couldn't rush everywhere anymore. We had to slow down and take our time. When the twins arrived we had to slow down even more! Just chill, take your time, and don't worry about being late.

Two days after I had changed career to become a teacher, our eldest arrived. The tiredness of a new career and being a new parent was astounding. Get your sleep in.

Nothing even closely matches being a parent. Time with your kids is precious so enjoy it. People will be jealous of you having the opportunity to stay at home.

[jimbob78]

Thanks everyone for the advice! It helps knowing there are people in the same boat as me!!!!
Im sure you'll see alot more of me over the coming year as birth day is creeping ever closer...watch this space
Jim